The Schlagerboys are very excited indeed. Is this what it feels like being in Jedward?
Having studied the rehearsals continuously for the last seven days, both from our living room downstairs and our spare room upstairs, we're calling it for ten of the following countries:
Albania, Denmark, Romania, Moldova, Latvia, Ireland, Russia, Greece, Iceland, Israel, Switzerland, Belgium, Austria, Cyprus, San Marino, Hungary, Finland, or Montenegro.
Today Tooji has been sitting on a wall with his schlager friends in the back garden of his private villa in Baku. Apparently they have stopped partying now in preparation for Thursday. And a good thing too. We need Tooji to be in tip top form on the night for those hip swiveling thigh moves.
We are having three days without vodka and Pringles in solidarity with Tooji.
We notice different head wear today and thank heavens for that. It's very hot in Baku and so it's about time that grey flat cap went in the wash.
Last night in downtown Baku Uncle Ralph Siegel celebrated 40 years of Eurovision entries and the Schlagerboys are gutted we couldn't be there to award him with a Schlager Hall of Fame award. Of course the fact we weren't in Baku was probably the main reason Uncle Ralph decided it was safe to go ahead with the party.
The Schlagerboys have met Uncle Ralph a couple of times... well we say met; we ran after him in the press centre in 2006 shouting "Oh My God Its Ralph Seigel!" and he ran in the other direction. Previous to that we jumped on him in the hall in 2002 as he walked past our seat . We don't think he has ever recovered.
Of course much as we love Uncle Ralph, it has to be said that his song this year isn't exactly a schlager anthem and it's probably wise to have the party now because following "The Social Network Song" it is unlikely anyone will ask him again.
But lets not dwell on the present! Let us remember the schlager anthems that brought us here today; "Let's get Happy", "I Can't Live Without Music", "Wir Gebe'Ne Party", "En Bisschen Frieden" and of course, "Children, Kinder, Enfants". All hail Uncle Ralph! May you keep coming back to Eurovision, may the schlager force be with you for ever more! Hurrah!
It's been another busy day for our favourite Norwegian singer as he prepares for the week ahead.
Here is Tooji making sure the security guards feel welcome and part of the team. Sample conversation:
Tooji: Hiya! Security guard: Grunt Tooji: Oooh, I'm that hot, and look at me in my shorts! I don't know how you cope in those thick jackets....
And here is Tooji being interviewed by Azeri TV. Tooji is looking very calm and collected and the bloke interviewing him is trying to find his words written on a cue card off screen.
Is there any truth in the rumour that the Euro Club has banned Eurovision music because a DJ dared to play the dance remix of "Apricot Stone" from Armenia on Friday night?
The Schlagerboys sympathise; someone once tried to play Edyta Gorniak at our house and we had to take decisive action! The culprit has been forced to listen to back to back Carola on all subsequent visits to Schlager Towers, and all ethno-Balkan wailathons are strictly forbidden.
The Schlagerboys are soooo excited about Norway this year! Tooji's rehearsal today was amazing , looking and sounding fab. We particularly like the backstage footage on this clip because we see that Tooji has someone to put his bracelets on for him. Schlager diva's do not do their own bracelets!
The Schlagerboys are loving Ukraine this year. Gaitana looks like she can hold her own in the schlager diva stakes; big hair, fab frocks and an attitude to match.
Here is Gaitana arriving at the Opening Party last night. If you're going to walk up a red carpet this is how to do it; a FABULOUS frock, fab head-wear and a flag. Douze points Gaitana!
Here is Gaitana standing next to her favourite lamp shade. Unfortunately this being Azerbaijan some clot forgot to buy a bulb. Apparently it will be switched on later.
Gaitana has hired a bike to see the sights of Baku. She doesn't actually ride it herself, she gets someone else to ride it while she gets ferried around in a coach. But she stops every so often for a photo opportunity. Here she is next to a ferry terminal.
Here's Gaitana again with her bike and a different view. Note again she's not actually riding it.
Good heavens! The stabilisers are off and she's riding through a market square! Note everyone around her is laughing or smiling.This is because Azerbaijan has paid for actors to roam the streets of Baku this week and be super friendly to everyone.
Oh! My! God! That get-up is just fabulous! You can't buy that quality in Primark! After saying hello to a flowerpot man Gaitana later meets some security guards who give a big thumbs up to her outfit. The bloke on the end with the big moustache is particularly enthusiastic!
Meanwhile at rehearsal Gaitana is honking her way through "Be My Guest" like there's no tomorrow. Our favourite bits are when she lifts her arms up and boogies for the chorus. This is how we try to dance after too many vodka diet cokes.
Last night it was time for Tooji to make his way to the Official Opening Party for Eurovision 2012. He mingled with lots of his fellow Eurocelebs. Here he is with Greece's Eleftheria Eleftheriou. They shared a bus to the party and no doubt had a discussion about hair product.
Here's Tooji with Roman Lob. Tooji can't understand why Roman would wear a beanie hat as surely that destroys all the effort that goes into the hairstyling.
Tooji makes his way up the red carpet wearing the remnants of a dead crow that the bus ran over on the way to the party. His hair looks nice though.
Tooji is in demand from all the media,. They're all asking him how he makes his hair look so soft yet it stays in place all day. Tooji isn't telling anyone his secret. He certainly hasn't shared it with the Norwegian dancer bloke behind him whose hair needs a good brushing.
And here's a rubbish picture of the Russian grannies. Not sure where Tooji's gone.
Ah, here he is. Enjoying the fireworks outside. Tooji's clapping his hands. He thinks it's lovely.
The Schlagerboys were very excited to hear that Arlene Phillips was choreographing the UK song again this year. Arlene was responsible for Jade Ewen's stairs in 2008 and if you must sing a ballad at Eurovision, stairs are a good thing to keep up the interest (just watch out for rogue violinists on the way down!)
We are disappointed with the lack of stairs this year, but apparently we do get fireworks near the end and there are a couple of dancers trolloping around in the darkness at the back of the stage. The BBC are clearly getting their money's worth from Arlene and her choreography skills.
The winner of The Schlagerboys "Key Change Award 2012" goes to Spain. Well, it was written by Lord Thomas of G:Son after all.
Spain also give us some fab backing singer moments this year. Not only does each singer get to walk on stage on their own in an allotted ten second time slot, they all then walk forward together on the key change and reach to grasp air in a classic backing singer move before walking to the side and back again. Fab!
Italy's backing singers could learn a thing or two from this lot. There's a fine line between being cool and being boring. Oooh, get us!
The Schlagerboys are very impressed with the feathery frock delivered by Azerbaijan this year. Apparently it's got things projected on to it throughout the performance; we only saw lots of twinkly lights but it was nice to look at for a bit.
Backing singers get a huge tick for waving chiffon around and generally doing lots of co-ordinated arm movements.
And while we are not huge fans of waily moments, if you are going to get a bloke to wail in the background during your songyou might as well get him to do it while sitting cross legged on a platform looking like a magic carpet six foot off the ground.
There is almost a dance routine in Italy this year with all the coordinated arm movements from Nina but we'd like a bit more effort, please. The backing singers are almost moving in unison. Maybe they're trying to be cool by making it look like they're not trying too hard. Apparently they were moved from Nina's right hand side to Nina's left hand side in the middle of the rehearsal. The poor dears must be done in with all that exertion.
The Schlagerboys are hoping this is the frock because it's glittery and fab. And we've got fingers crossed that Nina's going to have much bigger hair next Saturday. Ditch the headband, love.
The Schlagerboys are back in the press centre at Schlager Towers for the big five rehearsals and it's all very exciting. That is until Germany come on and bore us to death with "Standing Still"; if ever there was an appropriate title for a song this is it and Roman just wanders around trying to look meaningful and give the dullathon some life.
Nice headwear but that's about it.
We read somewhere that Roman was "being himself" for the contest and perhaps that is the problem; the schlagerboys suggest he tries being Gaitana instead!
Tooji had a party last night in Baku. Look at all the people who turned up. They'd obviously heard that he was going to put on a good buffet. We can just make out Tooji's trendy flat cap as he makes his way through the crowd hunting for the bowls of cheesy puffs.
He invited lots of his Scandinavian friends. Here he is talking to Loreen and asking her what on earth she's mumbling about when she's performing "Euphoria". Loreen is laughing and telling Tooji that she's got no idea and just makes up a load of old nonsense every time she does it.
Jónsi from Iceland and Soluna from Denmark came too. Jónsi decided to get his guitar out so they could have a singalong. Tooji's bored stiff and is wondering when the disco's going to start.
Tooji's friend Alexander Rybak came all the way from Norway to support him (and to sing in the interval act of the second semi-final). Alexander has clearly been buffing up as he's showing off his chunky biceps while he strums a tune on his violin.
And here's Tooji with Soluna again. They've managed to give Jónsi and his guitar the slip and everyone is much happier.
Even though Tooji hasn't been on stage in the Crystal Hall today, he's still a very busy boy and he's been practicing with his dancers in the hotel lobby. Nice shorts Tooji!
It's a good job they've moved all the delicate stuff out of the way as it getting a bit energetic. The woman with no shoes need to watch out that Tooji doesn't tread on her toes in his dancing frenzy!
Here's one of Tooji's dancers showing us what he's got. Does that bicep tattoo say "I heart Bobbysocks"?
And after all that rehearsing it's time for Tooji and his dancers to crowd round the laptop and have a look at all the latest Eurovision gossip. They're watching Loreen's rehearsal and trying to decipher what on earth she's singing about. The bloke slumped by the curtains has clearly given up and is more interested in checking his Facebook status updates.
Oh dear. Tooji still hasn't figured out what Loreen is on about. Never mind.
Today Tooji is celebrating Norwegian National Day! Hurrah! Here he is standing like a Queen next to a vase of flowers, and doesn't he scrub up well!
Oh look it's Per from MGP in a fab Norway suit! Tooji has nice forearms in this picture. He was simply born to wave a flag! It's all in the wrist.
And here's Tooji looking very suave with his backing dancers. He's going for the Loreen pop star sunglasses look and it's so working! Not sure who the bald bloke on the end his. Maybe he's the one that stands at the back where no-one can see him and screeches "Stay!" every so often.
Tooji is enjoying himself on the Norwegian National Day parade in Baku. We are particularly loving the woman who is about to throw up behind the tree; too much wine and those prawn vol-au-vents looked well dodgy.
And finally here is Tooji on the parade about to lead a mass singalong of "Lenge Leve Livet". Surely he should be carried on a throne by some burly men in leather skirts? Come on Norway! Treat your schlager icons with due respect!
In an effort to demonstrate we're not totally obsessed with Tooji and Norway this year we thought we'd better interview some other artists too. This year's Azeri song is written by the same bunch of Swedes who wrote "Running Scared" last year. And to sing it Azerbaijan chose a woman with big hair who likes billowy frocks. Hurrah! Oh! My! God! It's Sabina Babayeva!
Schlagerboys: What's your outfit and performance going to be like on stage in the Crystal Hall? We’re hoping for lots of billowing material and a few wind-machines….
Sabina Babayeva: And don’t forget about LED-elements! If you want a serious answer from me, and my team, we are still working on the performance so let's wait for some details.
SBs: Darling, we don't want serious answers! But we are looking forward to seeing what your frock looks like! Unfortunately we won’t be coming to Baku for Eurovision. What are the tourist hotspots we’ll be missing out on?
Sabina: First of all, everybody needs to see an ancient Baku's architecture, second – Caspian Sea is beautiful this time of year. Grab a ticket and come at least for a couple of days!
SBs: How on earth did Azerbaijan manage to build the Crystal Hall in about 6 weeks? Is the paint still wet?
Sabina: We do make things happen on time. Believe me! I don’t know about paint but promise to check for you as soon as I'm there.
SBs: Well, you'll need to be careful in your big new frock! What happened to the chap with the angel wings from 2008? Is he still around? And did he give you any advice for your Eurovision performance?
Sabina: Do you mean my friends Elnur & Samir? Of course, they are around and kicking! Before Eurovision they’ve said that I need to stay focused, work, and trust in my vocals, the audience and Eurovision fans for support. And it’s going to be ok, so I’m trying to do my best and to follow their lead.
SBs: We were in Amsterdam and saw you give someone a traditional Azeri hat. Can we have one?
Sabina: I will try send you a couple of them, just need to get back to Baku finally…
SBs: Your song is a bit slow. Will you be giving it a disco remix for the journalists in the Euroclub to dance to?
Sabina: Already have 2 dance remixes, disco an synthpop versions, acoustic version and Azerbaijani version, which is called "Gel". I think it’s more than enough (laughter).
SBs: How come your song is written by Swedes?
Sabina: Their song won last year, remember? They were the best and the song is really great, I love it, I feel it and that’s the most important thing for me. I’m really happy that our national jury chose this one.
SBs: Do you have a message for the readers of Schlagerblog?
Sabina: Guys, I will be very glad to see you all in Baku! Love you and thank you for all your support!
Have fun on stage next week Sabina! We'll be watching from the UK!
