We're ignoring the Albanian song as it's rubbish and shouty and can only be improved by a great-big-gay-hands-in-the-air disco remix, so it's time for the Schlagerboys' highlights of the 2011 schlager year. Hurrah!
5. Meeting Jenny Ace of Base at the Dansk Melodi Grand Prix Opening Party (well, downstairs at a little bar somewhere in Copenhagen) and getting her to choose her favourite Blue-head-on-a-stick and her running her fingers over Duncan, Simon, Lee and the other one and then saying "I will have them all!". Obviously we told her she was an absolute 90s Europop icon and she replied in a deadpan voice that she wanted to marry both of us. LEGEND!!
4. Alcazar's absolutely final ever live performance (until someone offers them another schlagertastic anthem for Melodifestivalen in a couple of years time). Clearly the classic line-up is still the one that includes (Mi Amore) Annikafiore and Magnus Carlsson but Lina, Tess and Andreas made the 10 hour wait at the front of Stockholm Pride stage, putting up with rubbish Ukrainian boybands and blokes in their underpants doing inappropriate things on a stripper's pole and not daring to go to the loo in case we couldn't get back through the throngs again, worth it).
3. We were in Stockholm earlier in the year aswell to see Sanna Nielsen at the Rival Hotel. She was fabulous, although it was all a bit acoustic. We queued for a CD, which she signed, and obviously we told her she was our favourite. But there's no doubt that the schlager highlight of being in Stockholm in April was wandering past Åhléns department store, realising that there were various celebs shaking fundraising tins for UNICEF, and then seeing, OH! MY! GOD! Lil Lindfors. We were schlager starstruck to see such an icon whilst just wandering round in the street. We had to wait ages as she was being hogged by some bloke and his kid. We did feel like elbowing the child out of the way to get at Dame Lil, but felt this wouldn't have gone down too well. Eventually we got a chance to buy a charity badge, tell Ms Lindfors what an icon she is and then, as this moment would probably never come again, we asked her to sing a verse from the song she sang during the opening of Eurovision 1985. OMG!!
2. New schlager icons were born this year. We knew Dame Shirley was back, Back! BACK!! in Melodifestivalen 2011 and we knew she was going to be accompanied by her Angels, but we didn't realise that the Angels would very nearly eclipse Shirley in sheer schlager fabulosity. The performance of "I Thought It Was Forever" turned Shirley's Angels into icons, what with all the strutting on enormous heels and all those hair-flicks.Then the Angels got taken on as backing singers for Azerbaijan at Eurovision and then went on and won!!
During the week in Düsseldorf we met the Angels in the Euroclub. They were hanging out with a load of Swedish people, so we felt it was appropriate to tell them they were fabulous, took a photo and then asked them to do a couple of "I Thought It Was Forever" hair-flicks for a rubbish schlager video with us screaming in the background. OMG!!! It's THE schlager move of 2011!
1. There is only one schlager icon that can top a Shirley's Angels hair-flick and that's Dame Kirsten Siggaard, the ultimate Scandinavian schlager diva. There we were, minding our own business in the press room in an arena miles outside of Copenhagen, watching the dress rehearsal of Dansk Melodi Grand Prix, when Dame Kirsten walked in eating a bran muffin. We pounced on her and, bless her, she even said "Oh! The Schlagerboys!", although it was probably more in fright whilst thinking "Why on earth didn't anyone tell me these pair of stalkers were here?" and eyeing up the quickest escape route. Dame Kirsten had a huge schlager influence on both of the Schlagerboys in our formative years and after we'd had a photo, told her how fabulous she was and explained what a huge icon she still is, we had to have a sit down.
Spanish TV have announced today that Pastora Soler will represent Spain in Baku next May.We've done a bit of a YouTube search and she seems to be fond of shouty ballads and doing a bit of flamenco screaming, but at least she's got great taste in fab frocks and big hair, so there's alot of potential. Especially if Lord Thomas of G:Son shoves a song or two in to the Spanish selection.
Ms Vinnikova is having another go at representing Belarus with "Shining In Twilight". It's OK but really isn't a patch on the song that Anastasiya should have sung in Düsseldorf, "Born In Bielorussia", which is clearly a lost classic.
There are all sorts of reasons to get excited about Melodifestivalen 2012 and we could go on for ages (and probably will do) about the return of schlager divas Charlotte, Lotta and Afrodite but what we really need are a few new schlager divas. Mimi Oh has appeared on the schlager scene recently and released a video of her single "Kom Hit Och Dansa" looking all the world like she's just stepped off stage from Melodifestivalen 1987, having nicked Lena Philipsson's outfit on the way, and she'll be taking part in the second Melodifestivalen heat next February in Gothenburg. Oh! My! God! It's Mimi Oh!!!
Schlagerboys: Why do you love the 80s so much?
Mimi Oh: There was something special about that decade. Happy, colourful and a lot of great music.
SBs: Are you desperate to be Lena Philipsson? Will you be getting Lena Ph 1980s big hair and learning the funky movements to “Dansa I Neon”?
MO: No, I really like Lena but I don’t want to be her, and unfortunately I won't do the moves from "Dansa I Neon". Time goes by, time for great new things!
SBs: Has Lena given you any tips on how to be successful at Melodifestivalen?
MO: No, I've never talked to her, I met Lili and Susie though. And they were really great!
SBs: OMG!! You met schlager icons Lili & Susie? That must have been a career highlight! What is your favourite Melodifestivalen song from the 80s? Please don't say "E' de' det här du kallar kärlek?" as that is just wrong, although Lasse Holm, as a songwriter, is a complete schlager icon!
MO: Haha! It’s not "E' de' det här du kallar kärlek?", what do you think about me! I'm not that old! I love "Främling", and "Dansa I Neon".
SBs: Don't you think that Anna Book is just a total schlager icon too and she was robbed in Melodifestivalen 2007? It should have been her in Helsinki and not The Ark!
MO: She seems really great but I didn't really like that song. "ABC" was better!
SBs: We'll have to disagree as "Samba Sambero" is a schlager classic of EPIC proportions, but we'll forgive you as you've clearly got great taste apart from this. Without giving too much away (we don’t want you to be disqualified!) what is your entry for Melodifestivalen 2012, "Det går för långsamt" like? Has it got a key-change? What are the lyrics all about?
MO: It’s an uptempo song with a lot of feeling, it's about when you just fall in love and you want to be close to that person!
SBs: Sounds like a schlager classic in the making. No confirmation of a key-change but there's still plenty of time to shove one in. It's probably too early, but have you been working on a dance routine? What sort of stage act will you have? And will it involve a wind-machine and leg-warmers?
MO: I will have dance with a lot of colour in my performance! I'm bringing a lot of the 80s to the modern times we have now, so I will not have leg-warmers. You can see how it usually looks when I’m on stage at my YouTube channel.
SBs: Shame about the leg-warmers but we're looking forward to the dancing and colour! Do you have a message for the readers of Schlagerblog?
MO: I really hope you will like what I will bring to Melodifestivalen this year and I will be forever thankful if you support me!!!!! Lots of love and never forget your dreams!
We won't forget ourdreams!! Good luck Mimi Oh!! And can't wait to hear all about the preparations! We'll be watching Gothenburg via the internet in February!
Here's Niamh Kavanagh starring as the Evil Queen in the Tivoli Theatre production of Sleeping Beauty in Dublin...
Looks like she gets to wear a fabulous hat and frock. Wonder if she sings "It's For You" too, the screeching she managed during the key-change on stage in Oslowould be enough to scare off any fairy princess. Although obviously we love Niamh and think she's fabulous.
The Schlagerboys tuned into the Swiss national final on Saturday. The entries this year were all a bit serious and dull, including far too many who played their own instruments and wrote their own songs. It was all a bit odd how the acts were only allowed to sing two minutes of their entry, while three random Swiss blokes, who clearly wouldn't know much about fun even if it came and slapped them in the face with a wet haddock, rambled on for ages between songs. Although keeping the songs down to two minutes was perhaps a blessing in disguise for some of the entries, especially the one that won.
There were a few highlights of the evening though...
- Dame Lys Assia performing "C'était Ma Vie", to the cheers and a standing ovation from the assembled gayers in the audience.Lys has apparently takne the hump after coming 8th and demanded an apology from the judges for slagging her off.
- Our favourite song was the cheesy bloke with a violin doing the only vaguely schlager song of the night. This would have been fab in Baku and will no doubt go down a storm in Eurodiscos for years to come. AND it had the first key-change of the 2012 National Final season (there may have been one earlier but the songs were too dull to notice.)
- the videos of the presenter wandering round a barren building site in Baku, allegedly where the venue for Eurovision 2012 is being built, and asking if he could lend a hand to some bemused builders. He even offered to move a couple of concrete blocks around. We're not quite sure how serious this was ment to bebut it doesn't bode well for anyone going to Baku next May that the arena hasn't even been built yet.
Kati Wolf is part of some sort of Hungarian celeb-packed Christmas song, complete with children's choir. Kati gets to stand in a room, belting out her part, while dressed as a Christmas tree decked out in toilet rolls. There seems to be at least half a dozen key-changes, and it starts snowing all over Kati (even though she's still standing in someone's fancy front room) just at the most dramatic point of the song. Kati clearly had it written in to her contract that she had to be the most glam singer in the video, as the other woman just sits slumped in an armchair all the way through the song. Happy Christmas Kati!
Norwegian schlager diva Benedicte Adrian is back, Back! BACK!! She was one half of Dollie Deluxeback in the early 80sand she'll be taking part in MGP next year.
However, we are a little worried that she's drafted in a couple of blokes to help her, one of whom is described as "the Norwegian Eminem", which can't possibly be a good thing. And the song they'll be singing, "Little Bobbi", is described as "Middle Eastern pop meets dubstep on a hip hop night at a club run by Prince."
